Saturday, April 28, 2018

Don't Let Society Dictate Your Life

Hey Guys!!!!

Today, as I was walking back home in the morning, two nuns were rushing to work, one a senior and another a junior. They were wearing their official nun's dress and the senior had a hand bag and a carry bag and the junior a backpack using as it should be. She was not shy to carry it on her back. Nobody felt it odd that a nun is having a backpack on her back, but the senior was not comfortable with that.

She forced the junior to take off the backpack (It was quite heavy) and offered to carry it for her in her hand and gave her the carry bag. 

It was an eye opener to me, though the junior was comfortable with the way she took care of herself with that bag, the senior was making sure that the junior conducts herself as the society dictates. Its not weird, we all do that in our daily life, the question everyone asks before they do anything is, "what would people think?"

And we direct our life according to the society's norms and also according to the sensibilities of the people.

But I want to say, rules are good, as its for our safety, but, to act according to the sensitivity and sensibility of many people which make up a society, No way!!!! Its impossible.

Years back, there was a beautiful nun in our convent. She sang so beautifully that it was a piece of heaven on Earth. Her character impeccable. She was always smiling and happy to help anyone and everyone, but one day, she was ostracised (thrown out) from society. You know a rumour spread that she was in love with a young man and got herself pregnant and she got it aborted too- A nun with a child (which was not true)

That is how vicious (cruel) the society is, you can never make the society happy because its a bunch of people of different tastes and morals. But one thing I can guarantee, its very much easier to make your own Self happy, without crossing off your moral boundaries.

You might make mistakes, but it was made by you and not because somebody forced you to do.  Nobody knows except you, what made you take each and every decision of your life, the circumstances, etc... The only thing that matters is, you have a choice in your life to decide, use it wisely and not the society which should rule your decision.

I really hope the senior nun will let go of her fear of society and live a fruitful life. And the singer nun, cleared her name, by living her life as she usually did, singing her cares away, since she was not maligned in the first place, it was the society who smeared her with dirt and that will go eventually. Remember, only truth prevails.

Be truthful to your Self and do what is right for you, that makes you happy and in the long run brings happiness to others.

Live your life and be happy.

See you.

Meena




Friday, April 27, 2018

Aim in Life

Hey Guys!!!!

I know, its weird to speak of aim in life. If I say, everyone has only one aim in life, then how much more weird it will be?

Yesterday I met two Australian ladies who came to India to follow a Yogini (a female sage) named amma. The younger of the two is a staunch believer of amma. She has been following her for the past 8 years. So I asked her "What good of amma do you use in your daily life?"

She replied, " I don't know, I guess, amma helps a lot of people and that I do too." And she asked, am I following amma. I replied in the negative.

Its not that I am against anyone or anything. Its because I should know, why I would like to follow a person.

So while talking, I was asking myself, why am I here in this world in the first place? While evaluating life - sitting in the chair and wasting tons of words (part of profession) to impress others. Is it worth it? What is my aim in my life?

This put me in a search mode, well, its not easy to get answers to weird questions. But as I was returning back home, I happened to see the perfect sunset and that made me wonder, "Wow!!!! Look at the view, its superb and the sun, unconditionally shines its best, not expecting to be praised by anyone." I hadn't anyone to share it and even if I want to praise the sun, it is not going to happen.


Then I looked at nature, every living and non living are giving their best expecting nothing in return. The blooming flowers, the trees, the song of the birds, the forest, the rivers, the mountains, the snow, the stars, the clouds, the rain, the spring, the breeze, etc..etc........ they all make us feel very much at peace,  all these things bring a smile, a happiness, a contentment, love within us. Its special. These living and non living things are not going out of the way to bring us all these feelings. They are living their life, not thinking what others think. They are their own self.  At that moment I knew what my aim in life is and that goes for you too.

Give your best, live your best, love your best, help your best, without expecting anything in return, believe it, that is what we call selfless love. Only those who love themselves can give love to others. Only those people who is filled with love can give their best or else, they will always fall short. 

I do not want any of you to have a measuring tape of how you perform, there is none. Each and every person is unique and no person is same and the calibre too is different, but I can guarantee one thing as you start giving your best, the avenues which will be opened will be manifold, that is the beauty of being a human being.

Hope you will give it a thought.

See you.

Meena



Thursday, April 26, 2018

Let God Take Over

Hey Guys!!!

I know, its very difficult to understand the unseen God and His workings. But believe, there is a very big Super Power, who works in the background at all times.

Have you wondered how your human body works? Do you have any role in any of its workings except for the basics of eating, drinking, resting and keeping it clean?

When you look at the sky, how beautiful everything is placed, have you role in any of it? Look at the nature, how much abundantly its giving us, have you any role in it except for utilizing it to the very maximum?

But I say, this super power has the lead role, and that is who He Is - The Almighty God.

I would like to say an incident which happened very recently, my friend John wanted to purchase a car but he had no money to give for his downpayment, so he asked his friend for a loan and his friend readily accepted to lend him. So he booked the car and paid a small amount as assurance that he will pay the downpayment when the car arrives, which was 4 weeks later. He was happy and his family waited for it expectantly.

After two days, John's friend called and said that he is unable to lend any money because he lost some money. John was a bit shocked. He didn't know what to do, he knocked many doors for a loan, but he was not successful.

His mother-in-law, a believer in God, opened the Bible for receiving the message of God (1 Samuel 7 : 5-6). She got the message to wait that day in prayer and fasting to know the plan of God. She did it on her own, as John did not believe in all these nonsense.

That evening John told his wife Susan, "Dear, I think, I will ask my mom, I am not sure, whether she will give me, but I feel like asking her." His mother a normal mom, who loved to buy expensive things and scolds her children publicly without any care or sense, was a force in itself. Susan replied, I will take our daughter out but don't lose hope if your mother does not help you out.

The next day after breakfast, Susan with her daughter left for her home, which was a half hour ride. John took the courage and asked his mom hesitantly, "Mom, I need some financial help from you." His mom was surprised and asked, how much do you want?"

John was shocked, he didn't expect to happen it so fast and easily. He replied 100000 rupees. His mother without any hesitation said, "I will give you the cheque, you can withdraw immediately."

John couldn't believe his ears, he automatically looked up and thanked that super power, which really made this happen. He called his wife and informed this good news, which in turn was passed on to his mother-in-law.

Mother-in-Law, thanked the Lord for He did keep His word - Proverbs 3:6 “In everything you do, put God first, and he will direct you and crown your efforts with success.”

I know, its not easy to let go, but just see in John's case, if he had taken a loan from his friend, he need to repay within the said time, but when his mother-in-law requested God's help, it happened - The miracle which really aligned all the negative forces into a positive output. That cannot happen from a human mind, it can happen from only one source - From the abode of God.

I would not say that you should go to church or temple or mosque. There is only one God and God has only one residing place - Your heart. Just talk to Him there, say your troubles and let it go. If you have trouble in hearing the voice of God, then you can use your spiritual books, they can guide you. But personally I prefer a heart - to - heart talk. If you have not started yet, now is the best time to do so. Just try it.

Welcome to the world of nothingness. And see the fireworks of miracles!!!!!

Have a nice day.

Meena

Friday, April 13, 2018

Judging Others

Hey Guys!!!!

I remember when I was small, I told something bad about somebody to my dad, I have never seen him so stern before or after that incident. He sat up straight and looked directly at me and said, "This will be the first and the last time, you will speak ill of others, never ever judge others. When you make a mistake and the world around you point at you, and say, you are not a correct person, how would you feel?  Do you want that?"

"No Dad, I wouldn't want that. I am sorry. I didn't know." This happened when I was 7 yrs old. When I heard my dad say so strongly and the way he told me, believe it or not I really felt fear creep through my very core.

That was an eye opener, From that very day, I make sure that I consciously would never speak ill of others and I try to stop if others speak as such. Whenever I come to that situation, that fear just wakes up within - shaking the young Meena from within, to say, "Shut up Meena."

Its not our place to criticise others, they might have done whatever they did, hoping it is correct, so we accept it as correct for them. If they have done wrong, then it is their problem, they will take care of it. Don't force our ethics on others.

 Just enjoy life, people and the place you are around, no matter how wrong or right it is. Hope you would do right with you.

Take care.

Meena


Thursday, April 12, 2018

The LoC of Friendship

Hey Guys!!!

Friends are the best, when they are there to support us, guide us and lend an ear to hear us. But when they try to take the place of someone, then that is where they cross the Line of Control (LoC).

We all have a place in life, no matter what, be there and don't overstep it.

Last day, my friend, a married lady who has a good-for-nothing husband and smart two daughters. So it was natural, she needed someone to hear her problems and that was with her colleague, who was a man. Their friendship grew, they helped each other out, now the man wants to have a say in each and every aspect of her life - to whom to talk with, to whom to be with, etc...etc..... that was the death knell of that beautiful relationship. 

Whose mistake is it?

It is nobody's mistake, we cannot control our heart and the effects the other people have  on us. It can escalate for sure.
Then there are the famous "circumstances", like my friend, she has to take care of her two daughters, she cannot ruin their reputation no matter her husband is a bastard of a man and she would never take liberties with her person with another man, whether he is her best friend, until she is free.

That is where as a friend, we should know, till where is the LoC. Believe it, if you wish to take to the next level, just let it go and be away from the person, you want to be with and there lies the truth, if your partner is attached to you, then for sure he/she will feel and then they will start thinking and that is when the question arise, Why are you avoiding me? And you can say frankly what you feel. If its meant for you, it will happen for you or else, just give the freedom the other person needs and the friendship too.

Never force or dump yourself onto your friends for the sole reason that you are his/her friend.

See you Guys!!!!

Meena

Wednesday, April 11, 2018

Friendship

Hey Guys!!!!

The one relationship in the world, were we take it for granted, until we know the value of it, when we lose it.

We cannot define friendship in set of words, but it covers  vast aspects of several relationships, bypassing all categories of relationship like relationship between spouses, parent-children relationship, teacher-student relationship, student/s-student/s relationship, colleagues, employer-employee relationship and the criteria goes on and on...... its a never ending saga of bonds or connections. How do we define friendship?

  • two persons connect together by helping at the right moment without any bias of gender, place, caste, community or religion?    or is it
  • The unconditional love, without any expectation of returning the favours received. 
But one thing is for certain,
  • It never tries to cross the border of etiquette or hurt the other person purposely.
  • Its an all giving and all consuming connection
These features are more pronounced when we are in school or college, but as we mature, we tend to withdraw into the shell of anonymity, thereby removing the friends which were in the fringes and letting only the friends with depth. And those friends are for life.

Friendship is one relationship we cannot forego in life, we can say, the right friends are the angels in our lives, believe it or not, they are God sent people who will be there in the time of need. But as a friend try not to cross the Line of Control (LoC). If you cross that you sure are doomed guys, you will lose the best of friends. Its very very uncomfortable and awkward. So I advise Be the best friend within the LoC.

Try to find good friends and throw away friends who are bad influence to you and keep the very few, who really help you grow. 

Have a nice day.

Take care.

Tuesday, April 10, 2018

Its Boring & Lonely

Hey Guys!!!!

This is an apt description for this generation or shall we say the mankind of this era?

What happened to bring us to this situation?

Well!!! its high time to re-evaluate our lifestyle, what do you think? Shall we?

If you want it in a sentence what's wrong with us, then face the truth, we have a void within ourselves that we are trying to fill it with some sort of activity like having fun, party, eat, shop, sex, learn, read, pray, surround with friends, family, love,  the dream girl/boy, etc..etc.. but still you cannot fill it, you are not happy.

The happiness we get from the above activities is a momentary thing. After a day or two, you are in the same craving state, a feeling of something missing. Its an unending void and it cannot be filled, no matter what you do. Did you know it?

Well, its true, you cannot fill it with the activities stated above, but don't lose heart, you can be fulfilled in the simplest way,  if you love your self, if you respect yourself, if you can feel comfortable with you, if you are at peace with you, you are content and happy being with you. Then you  don't need anything, you are just fine with what you have, wherever you are, with whomever you are with and that means, that you don't have a void.

To make that happen, just follow your heart. You can listen to your mind, but the ultimate decision.... just follow your heart. What my heart says is not yours for the taking, your heart knows what you want, trust me, its the best moment, be conscious of each moment. Then you are going to beat Boring & Lonely and be way cool in your life. Want to bet?

Take care.

See You...

Meena

Saturday, April 7, 2018

Smile

Hey Guys!!!!

The best thing about smiling is, it has many expressions packed into one single smile, its like 1000 words are packed into one smile, its like the pleasure of presence expressed. Its lots of things.

For example,

you see a person, instead of saying "Hi!!!" you just smile.

So when the smile is returned, its like, "Hi!!!! It was a pleasure meeting you or it might mean, I am not averse to have met you, etc..."

If the smile is not returned, then he/she  is not interested in making acquaintance with you.

When a mother sees her child - the first expression is the smile and that goes for the child too, the expression of happiness, love and relief packed in one.

When a lover sees his love - the first expression is the smile of Love, happiness and contentment.

When a husband sees a wife - again the famous smile.

For each and every facets of life, smile is a must, an inevitable necessity.

Isn't it beautiful,

Communication without language or words or sound with a fellow being.

If you give me a choice, I would prefer to use only smile.

Hope you too incorporate this easy mode of communication more and more.

See you.

Meena

Friday, April 6, 2018

Never Cross The Invisible Boundary

Hey Guys!!!

As a human being, we have several boundaries - the boundaries of countries, lands, seas, air,  houses, rooms, personal space and even relationships.

Now, why do you need these boundaries?

For the smooth running of relationship between countries, people and between family members.

I do not know much about history about creating boundaries and I am not going into it. I am much more into getting into the ways and means to have a life with happily ever after.

One day, I met a mother of two boys and she was complaining that she does not want to welcome one of her son's friend (been together from childhood till 27 yrs) .

I was a bit surprised, because this long a friendship, does bring out a special affection, so I asked her, "Really!!!! Why?"

She replied, "This boy, whenever he comes to my house, comes directly to the kitchen, opens the refrigerator and checks out whether there is any food to eat and if there is anything he takes it without permission and have it and then comes to the living room and keeps his leg on the sofa. I really get so mad of his behaviour, I correct him for not sitting properly, but I cannot say don't open the fridge. Its not because I don't want to give him food or anything. But if it is my children, I would never allow them to do it."

Yes, its true, we also don't go an open a fridge in other people's house or even friend's house, isn't it, only if requested, we do it. Have you thought why?

Yes, the boy has overstepped his boundary. 

In human culture,  with respect to relationships, we have many restrictions, but if we are within the purview of our boundary, then we don't feel suffocated, but if we plan to get added perks, then believe it you will have to cross the boundary. 

At first, it will not be a big problem, but eventually, it will become a millstone around your neck, believe it, you will lose your own self respect, your own credibility. Is it worth it?

Do you know, why you overstep or when you overstep? 

Its because of your mind. Your mind says, "its ok to overstep, its not a big deal. Who will know it? Its not exactly overstepping, its just helping or some such dialogues" 

Guys!!! Better believe it and imprint it in your heart and your brain, its "Not Okay" to step on other's premises, physical or virtual, personal or otherwise, other than if its an emergency.

So never ever hear your mind's dialogue, it will ruin you. When the mind opens to dialogue, just shut it up.

Everyone has an inbuilt boundary defining system, when it comes to personal spaces and relationships and the defining organ is your heart where your heart says yes and no to each and every action, word and thought, just hear that.

Well how do you hear the heart?

Let me give an example, A woman comes to your doorstep and asks for money and the mind will say, "These type of people are cheaters and liars. There are many people who needs more than her, so just say no."

But something from within you says or urges, "please give her something..please give her something... Its like a plea" (Its a deeper voice). That is the voice of the heart.

When we are planning to do wrong, the voice from within is very loud, Like, when I want to say lies white or black, jokingly or seriously, this plea comes from within, "Meena, please say the truth, no...no...no...please don't lie....don't lie...don't lie...."  That is the voice of the heart and if you start hearing it and following it accordingly, believe it you have a far smoother life than what your plans for life will be.

So try to hear your heart and you won't overstep the boundaries and the best and easy way to do that is use minimum words than what is necessary and be truthful. 

Just try it out.

Bye.

Meena

Thursday, April 5, 2018

Early To Bed Early To Rise Makes A Man Healthy, Wealthy And Wise

Hey Guys!!!

Today I would like to speak about a very special saying which has a very big impact in life, "Early To Bed Early To Rise Makes A Man Healthy, Wealthy And Wise."


As a boarder (living in boarding school), the early to bed and early to rise was a must, I had to wake up at 5 am to go for the 6 am mass and that goes for all the boarders. At that time, I wished if I had been home, I could sleep to my heart's content, but that was childish thoughts to just simply waste time - sleeping.

Now I would like to ask a simple question, have you gone to space and seen the galaxy or to the depth of the ocean and seen the many wonders inside?
 For me the answer is no but I have seen it in movies, I grew up with stories of the dolphins and octopus, etc.... but if we have gone or not, they give a sense of awe, just when we look at the vast ocean or look up at the sky, they make us feel small - a sense of being a speck which is nothing with respect to their vastness and depth. 

That is where the early to rise helps, when you wake up early in the morning and have that first cold shower, it  brings a sense of freshness, a new energy and even if you are in the concrete jungle or the dormitory or a bunk (place is not an issue), believe it, there is this silence. The silence which surrounds us along with the darkness when we close our eyes has no boundaries or depth.  Its the depth (Ocean) and vastness (Sky) of you. Isn't it beautiful that you have a Universe or the Ocean within you?

When the silence surrounds us, we get a certain fear of the unknown. Believe it each and every person chickens just by seeing the silence or darkness

We don't feel comfortable with it at first but  just feel that, just take it as a challenge that you are going for an adventure, its like a travel to space or to the depth of the ocean - its silent there too, nothing is noisy.

Believe it, the first several years, you would never get into the depth of any silence because your mind will always sidetrack you, it would take you to several stations of your life, past and future but not your present. Don't allow yourself to take a ride with that naughty mind because - its just a distraction and not the real thing. 

Mind can never make anything happen but your heart can and your heart is as stable as an oak, it doesn't take you for a ride or put a smoke screen over the truth. So whenever mind takes you over, just stop it then and there, okay, I will give an example what is the game of the mind is like.

I am planning to wake up at 5 am and the first thought that comes to me is "Do you really want to wake up so early, why don't you sleep 15 more minutes, its okay, its just 15 minutes more, that's all. I hear that voice and sleep in bliss for 15 more minutes(that felt good).Then after 15 minutes, again the mind says, you know, if we can do it fresh from 1st of the week/month/year, so that we can put the date correctly (👀), and you can also get everything by then for the jog/yoga/,etc... and then the planning in the mind goes on and on....Are you sleeping? No you are thinking. Was it of any use?

That is one simple version of the mind game, it never is true, believe it, it can create several big games in a jiffy and I can guarantee for sure, if you are going to hear that voice, you are doomed, you will be worse than a ship wreck or a plane crash or unimaginable worse situation, where you are unsalvageable.

If you can overcome that thoughts the mind puts you and wake up early in the morning, whether its a monday or a Friday or a 1 or a 21 day of the month, you learn to choke the voice of the mind and hear your heart and that gets you to the deeper parts of you and brings out the real you, the you where you are not boring to you. 

Have you wondered all those famous scientists like Einstein, Isaac Newton, C.V. Raman, etc.. etc....and artists like Leonardo da vinci, Michael Angelo, etc....etc.... and very famous people, when we read their profile, we know that they are multifaceted,  they were the best in whatever they did, its not because they worked for it, it comes to them each and every facet opens to them and they just take the plunge, they don't care, whether its right or wrong, its like taking oysters from the sea bed, you see it, you take it. It just happens on you and you just are forced to have it no matter what.

This happens when you wake up early, do the yoga or meditation or jog or go to church or temple or mosque or whatever, but don't let you stay in bed, believe it you are more worth than your mind can paint you.

You are multi faceted and the best too, Look at the sun, it gives light, warmth, life and it does perfectly. Look at the flower, it gives colour, fragrance and helps in the procreation of life. All that surrounds you in nature are multi faceted, then why are you stopping short with one facet?

Yes, that is what I am saying, you guys are also multi faceted you have many talents inside and that will not bloom unless you wake up early in the morning and get the hell out of your bed. Believe it, I am still fighting with my mind the first thing in the morning. So its no easy task. So try to sleep early, then it can be easier.

Welcome board to the adventure of life. Wish me luck!!!!!

Bye

Meena






Wednesday, April 4, 2018

How to Stay Always Healthy


Hey Guys!!!

Have you wondered why some sickness cannot be cured? or why one fine day, you are afflicted with sickness and for lifelong you are bedridden? It does not mean that you had a viral attack or vitamin deficiency or some such sort. Any sickness, which is curable can be said due to above reasons, but when it doesn't cure after all the medications and treatments, then you will have to go deeper - A depth within you. Just like we going into the deepest part of the ocean or the universe, but its much more easier to go into you.

If ever you have read my previous blogs, its mostly full of crap called love. Have you wondered why all the religious books reiterate that Love thy neighbours as thyself?

Well, there is a secret behind it, Love, compassion, kindness, peacefulness are all part of the same emotion – Love.

Each emotion other than that stated above creates acid in your body. Any acid when it falls in any part of the body destroys that part completely and if regularly you are in anger, sadness, melancholy,  obsessions, hatred, non-forgiving nature, just imagine how much acid are you pouring into that same body part? How long do you think, they can bear this acidity on itself, it will eventually break down and you are going  down with it. And the consequences of your famous anger and all those negativity is  – being sick and unhealthy? Are you happy with that?

I hope not. The only way to be always healthy is to be in love. Love has a hormone that energizes each cell, heals each cell and above all, regenerates cell thereby giving you a young feeling.

That is why I always recommend “Be in Love”, "Love thy neighbours as thyself". At least to prevent sickness, you will take my advice to heart?

See you.

Meena

Monday, April 2, 2018

Take Risks But Not Recklessly


Hey Guys!!!!!

Have you had a moment of thought, when you felt, what if I had done a thing in a different way? To be honest, everyone gets this thought at one time or the other. During the time of decision, we decide, to play safe. But after that we see the results of the decision and that is when we think, what if I had done it the other way?

It is natural, but I learned this very early in life. In boarding school, every moment of my life circumstances was due to the decisions made either by me or by my boarding mistress or by my parents or my friends. Even though my parents think that they provided me a pampered lifestyle where I didn’t have to do anything except eat, drink, study, play and pray, they forgot that in these activities there are people involved and very different types of people.  So I had to make decisions, several times a day on a regular basis. For a three year old kid, decisions  were made with ease and without fear some decisions have backfired and some had been correct but one thing I learned is that, just decide what is right or what your heart says is right and don’t go for safe decisions.

We never know what our life holds the next moment, what we are going to face, but just because its unknown, doesn’t mean that life is unsafe.

Failure is not a good enough reason to live safe.  Taking risk does not mean that you have no fear and never think only fearless people take risks.

People who would like to come out of the box of  just living, who would like to make a difference in ones own life, who wants to live happily ever after are the ones who take risks. Believe it, you will never regret it because if you fail, you will know that you tried, you gave your best shot or you win.

Live your life consciously, knowing each step you are taking.

Decide wisely and take risks but not recklessly.

Take care.

Meena